Despite my parents’ guidance and concern, as I became a teenager in the late 1960s I yielded to peer pressure and the culture of the day, drifting into an angry existence. This downhill slide manifested itself in rebellion outwardly, yet inwardly I had a growing sense of emptiness and lack of purpose. I began to find trouble at the end of every dark alley and dead-end street. I was neglecting my studies and began to drink frequently and experiment with drugs. In spite of the partying and wild behavior on the surface, I was empty and dying on the inside. In my mind, I could not reconcile the hypocrisy of many churches and Christians.. Yet I did not understand myself or the world around me. I could not find a clear meaning for my life.

At this point I was desperate and started searching for answers. I wanted to be “cool,” but could never seem to quite make it. The confusing messages all around me eventually gave way to despair, and then depression. I looked for answers in every conceivable world religion, and then eventually turned to reading the Satanic Bible, still hoping that I would somehow find an answer. The only religion I did not consider was Christianity, because I had become convinced that Christians were absolute hypocrites, and that the traditions and hell-fire preaching I had been exposed to were totally irrelevant and bogus.

One of the few remaining interests I did maintain during this period was my involvement with sports. But when I was caught for possession of alcohol as a minor and suspended from my football team, I was thoroughly devastated. The dark hole deepened and the depression turned into suicidal thoughts.

Then, out of nowhere, a buddy of mine asked me to go to a meeting where a couple of “Jesus freaks” were going to talk. I jumped at the opportunity, figuring I would shred them apart. Little did I know my life was about to be transformed forever.

At the meeting, these “Jesus freaks” shared about their stories—music, alcohol, drugs—and how they had come to know the real Jesus. They also shared with us about how Bible prophecy had been fulfilled by Christ, and how it was being fulfilled in the world today. To my dismay, they not only withstood my best arguments, but they began to chip away at my heart of stone. The next week they continued and shared about the selfless love of Christ, who died for us on the cross, and my heart began to melt. By the end of the second meeting, they asked if anyone would like to meet Jesus personally and have their life changed. For the first time, I really understood the true message of the gospel, and to the shock of my friends, I got down on my knees right there in that living room. They were right—my life was changed forever!

This type of dramatic conversion led to a wholehearted abandonment to Christ and His cause. I wanted nothing else except to grow in my new faith and to serve Him. Given my earlier aversion to traditional Christianity and my dramatic conversion experience, I was not a good candidate for most traditional churches. I was taught and influenced in my early years as a Christian by believers who were loosely related to the Plymouth Brethren. I was taught the fundamentals of solid Evangelical theology, with an emphasis on true discipleship and practical Christian living. I also learned about the dynamic life and testimony of the New Testament Church, and how much of Christianity had exchanged this for human traditions and practices. I did not realize then, however, that this same solid foundation in studying and interpreting the Bible would later require me to adjust some of these early teachings.

From high school through my twenties, I devoted myself to evangelism, making disciples, and church planting. Eventually, this led to believing that I had been called by God to go to the mission field somewhere in Latin America. When studying the Bible, my highest goal was to always seek the truth, no matter what it would cost. Over the years, this core value forced me to rethink and study the Word of God afresh with an open mind. As I did this, I felt compelled to shift some of my earlier beliefs. The well-intended, yet narrow interpretations I had been taught eventually gave way to the truth. I learned along the way that the truth is often found somewhere between the polarized positions of various churches.

Because of these changes, I experienced many misunderstandings and the loss of friends. It was difficult fitting into or being accepted by many churches. This problem continued later with numerous mission agencies also, as I sought to go to the mission field. But through the years I have continued to serve the Lord, helping in many different churches and ministries. Like most people, I have experienced real disappointments and hardships in my life, yet God has always been faithful to walk beside me and give me the renewed strength to continue.